Krongblog

Photobooth 2011

2012-01-10T15:42:00.000-05:00

Forgot to post this over the summer.

New Year's in Vermont

2012-01-05T09:15:00.002-05:00

2011 Year in Review

2011-12-10T14:19:00.000-05:00

Hello there!

Time to write about our family's accomplishments this year, making special care not to mention any disappointments or setbacks, yes, it's the Christmas letter, 2011 edition!

Honestly, this was a pretty good year for us. We went on some nice trips, we tried new activities and skills, and some of the new things we learned last year became annual activities by dint of doing them again.

The big trip we went on was to the Canadian Rockies and the national parks of Banff and Jasper. The parks were spectacular, the company (Julie's mom and stepdad and her sister's family) was excellent, and we were luckier than most when it came to spotting wild animals. We saw a grizzly bear, mountain goats, and bighorn sheep. We also got to walk on a glacier and took a white water rafting ride through a glacial river (yes, it was cold -- ask Austin, who jumped in for a dip).

We visited eastern Canada, too, on our annual pilgrimage to Toronto. My parents took the kids to African Lion Safari, Julie and I took in the AGO and went shopping. We also hit Ontario Place, the ROM and ate lots of delicious Chinese food.

We also visited Florida and went down to NYC for a beautiful second wedding (renewal of vows). Closer to home, we went to a lovely wedding at Harvard Square. Soon it will be unremarkable, but this was the first gay wedding we attended, and it was so lovely that our only conclusion is that it must have strengthened our own bonds of marriage.

Mari is getting big and starting to occasionally get into that zombie reading state that has afflicted Austin for a couple of years. It is possible to pry the book from her fingers long enough for her to eat, but only just (she loves the Mercy Watson books -- thanks for the recommendation, local independent bookstore!). Mari had a spring dance recital, played soccer in the fall, felt confident enough on her bike to ride the Minuteman Trail and can do a pretty good cartwheel. More gymnastics are in her future! Mari also learned to knit this year and is working on a scarf. Pretty neat!

Austin is getting big, too. In the spring and summer, he played Little League and had a lot of fun. He went to a tennis camp this summer and played soccer in the fall. One highlight was that he passed the deep end test at Hale Membership Beach, meaning he spent the next few weeks clambering up (and splashing down from) the Aquajump, a floating trampoline. He climbed Mt Monadnock with Julie this summer! Among the books he enjoyed this year were Tom Sawyer and Hatchet (the latter inspired some experiments in fire making using flint -- turns out the key is to have a lot of dry, fluffy tinder).

Julie swam/rode/ran the Hale Triathlon again this year. This time she placed 2nd in her age group! She's continues to teach the communications seminar at BU Med School and has taken on running M&Ms and all sorts of academic responsibilities. She still practices medicine at Dorchester House. We're still part of the Newton Family Singers and Julie has really stepped up; she organized and conducted our carols in front of the Waban Tree Lighting, and is a featured singer on a number of songs in our winter concert. She's still too shy to play the accordion on stage, but it's just a matter of time.

[transition into third person mode:]

Jack is now teaching at Dorchester House! The Clemente Course is being held in the new wing of that building and Jack is back to directing the course, too. He continues to do some freelance writing, and this fall worked as an intern at the public radio program Here and Now at WBUR. Fun! Being such a BUR uber-fan, it was a treat to learn that the people who work there are as nice and sharp as he hoped -- maybe more so. He's still playing guitar (and mandolin) with the NFS, and played bass at the Lowell Fiddle and Banjo festival, accompanying his friend Andy on banjo (trying to channel Victor Wooten). (if you're wondering what the festival is like, here's a video page)

We had lots of houseguests this year, including Pauline, Emma and Val, Amy and Aaron, Edie and Bill, Amy, John and Lucia, Hadas, and my parents. You're welcome, too!

Stay in touch, be healthy, and have a great 2012!

Halloween 2011

2011-11-06T10:32:00.000-05:00

The "Ghost of Maureen"

Portland, ME

2011-10-31T10:02:00.000-05:00

We went up to Portland 10 days ago to celebrate our 10th anniversary. My in-laws were nice enough to take the kids to Pittsburgh and an adventure with their cousin and aunt and uncle.

But enough about them.

We had a great time in Portland. We stayed at the Eastland Park Hotel, a great location and with a terrific view from the hotel bar at the top floor. Our first night we had dinner at 555 at 555 Congress Street. Julie had the tasting menu: onion soup, beet salad, lobster mac and cheese, cheese plate and a pumpkin dessert. I had a market salad and divers scallops and housechurned ice cream (chocolate-coconut and coriander-pistachio and another that I'm blanking on but was unexpected and delicious).

The next day, a Saturday, we took our bikes and rode down to Two Lights, a state park with view of two lighthouses. Biking around Portland is terrific -- not too hilly, not that many cars and we got great advice from the Gorham Bike and Ski shop. Anyway, Two Lights was beautiful, with large hexagonal rocks in the crashing surf. It was the last weekend of the season for the Lobster Shack and we enjoyed a modest lunch there.

We rode back to Portland with a detour around to see another lighthouse, at Portland Headlight. We rode down Commercial Street and found the Harvest on the Harbor Festival. A tent was set up with lots of vendors handing out samples of food and wine and beer, so we rushed back to the hotel to change, hopped into a taxi and got into that tent! It was a great way to sample food from lots of restaurants in the area and we even got to hang out with cookbook author Kathy Gunst before and after her cooking demonstration. We liked her cookbook and bought a copy for a friend.

On Sunday, we were a little more mellow, riding around town to the West Promenade to see some beautiful old houses, including one with a squash court on the third floor (the owner was outside gardening and told us about it) and the house Julie stayed in when she did a rotation at Maine Medical Center. We then took the bike path around to the east side, by the water treatment plant (!) and the remains of the USS Portland. We ended up near Duckfat, a small bistro that makes incredible french fries (may be the frying the medium that helps). Soooo good.

We did some shopping in the Old Portland district where we enjoyed the Maine Pottery Co-op and Julie tried on some clothes in a designer's little studio. We wanted to have a little sustenance before we hit the road so Julie had a salad and I had a delicious BLT at the Local Sprouts Cafe (a food co-op that the hostess at 555 recommended to us).

In all, a great urban adventure, terrific biking, and delicious eating. We had a wonderful time and look forward to bringing the kids with us next time to see the Victorian Mansion, Cryptozoology Museum and the ropes courses.

Reading

2011-10-03T13:49:00.001-05:00

I did it!

Sometime late last year I read that New Bedford was sponsoring a contest to see if people could read 50 books in a year. I didn't sign up but I've been tracking my reading on Goodreads and I just hit 55, with 3 of the books being solely picture books for children. (That does include, however, books like Scenes from an Impending Marriage which is a very short book of cartoons about wedding planning; on the other hand, it also includes at least one book that was more than 1000 pages long.)

From here on, I'm just coasting... until I finally pick up Moby Dick. (Meanwhile, next to my bed is "Why You Should Read Moby Dick" by Nathaniel Philbrick.)

New band

2011-08-31T21:40:00.001-05:00

The kids were banging around on their instruments and have a new band. Their name? Introducing...

The Diarrhea Bunnies!

Toronto 2011

2011-08-30T08:59:00.002-05:00

A late report of our July visit to Toronto. It's been a while, so nothing will be in order and I'll probably only remember the highlights but...

First highlight! My parents took the kids to African Lion Safari. Apparently, it's much nicer than it was three decades ago when my parents were last there, and the kids had a great time, not only riding around the park in a car, but also getting to touch and ride on animals in a zoo area.

And the reason that was a highlight: Julie and I got to spend the day downtown. We had fun shopping in the Umbra store, a Canadian company that designs housewares, and then we visited the Art Gallery of Ontario. The main reason to visit the AGO was to see Abstract Expressionism at MOMA, which was a nice show -- I especially liked the short videos that showed conservators re-enacting technique, like Rothkos very thinned out washes -- but we were most impressed with Giuseppe Penone's tree sculptures. Displayed in the gallery at the front, north end of the building under the new facade designed by Frank Gehry, the gallery was wonderfully lit with lots of natural light. Penone took trees and carved chunks of outer rings from them until he exposed an earlier, younger version of the tree. Really striking.

The rest of our day was spent around Queen Street West, including shopping at Outer Layer which was chock full of fun stuff and nice people. That's where I spotted a purse hanger; Julie thought it was sort of ridiculous. A visit to Kensington Market was fun, with all the import shops and some neat artist's shops (a great print-making shop whose name I've forgotten).

In the evening, we picked up Pauline from the airport! We got to spend the rest of the week with her.

On Canada Day, we went down to Harbourfront. It was pretty crowded but it was fun to see a crack jump-rope team in action and we saw a nice documentary called "Finding Farley" about a young family (the son was about 2 or 3, and they had a dog) tracing Farley Mowat's journeys around the country. Some beautiful photography and scary amounts of black flies.

During the week we visited the ROM, and saw a cool exhibit on water (I was amazed at the early use of dams and the latest water devices: playground equipment that pumped water into tanks in Africa -- kids play and they provide water to their community!).

We saw The Glass Menagerie at Soulpepper; we'd previously only seen comedies at this repertory theater. The show was good and I was particularly impressed with Jeff Lillico, the actor who portrayed the Gentleman Caller.

Soulpepper is in the Distillery District and because it was Jazz Fest in Toronto (as well as Pride Week), there were a number of combos set up around the plazas. We also found a store that sold purse hangers and with the encouragement of Pauline, Julie found them delightful. We later had a search for them in the Pacific Mall.

Once again, we made it to Ontario Place and with the kids being much better swimmers, they had a lot of fun in the water park. We also saw some circus acts around the park and Austin and Julie saw a "4-D" movie about dinosaurs.

One new place we went this time was Scarborough Bluffs. It's changed since I was a boy, from erosion and also with what I think is a new system of water filtration. The trails were not particularly long, but it was a pretty walk.

Tooth

2011-03-17T08:30:00.000-05:00

Mari lost her first tooth last night! And another one is loose...

Seven Bridges Road

2011-03-12T23:55:00.001-05:00

A recent obsession with the song Seven Bridges Road led to lots of time on YouTube and Wikipedia, and even an actual book. I figure after making a little effort, it's worth putting together some of the information for others.

So, Seven Bridges Road was written by Steve Young and recorded for his album Rock Salt and Nails (1969). Here's a YouTube of a version by Young from his second album, named after the song:

There are more recent live recordings online and he plays and sings the song in a similar style, as a singer-songwriter.

In 1973, Iain Matthews, of Fairport Convention (and other rock/folk/pop bands) recorded the song with the harmonies that have come to define Seven Bridges. It appears on his album Valley Hi.

Who arranged the harmonies? Well, if it wasn't Matthews, perhaps it was the producer of Valley Hi, the former Monkee Mike Nesmith!

According to the photographic history book The Eagles: An American Band (p. 166), Don Henley and company would sing Seven Bridges Road in their dressing room as a vocal warm up before shows on their Hotel California tour (that album was released in late 1976). The band later performed the song on stage and a version of it was recorded for Eagles Live. The liner notes to Eagles : The Very Best Of (2CD) state that they learned the song from Steve Young, but they clearly borrowed harmonic ideas from Matthews. Here they are from Seattle 1977:

The Eagles version has become the most iconic, although Dolly Parton's all-star bluegrass band does a pretty fine job by it, too. Here's Dolly:

More recently, Keith Urban (Mr. Nicole Kidman) has been bringing up opening acts to sing the song with him. In 2009, Sugarland add two voices to Urban (as well as a mandolin). I have to say, one thing I love about Sugarland is how happy they seem to be to be making music. It's not perfect, but they're having fun and projecting that; a charming stage presence.

In 2010, Urban was on tour with Grammy winners Lady Antebellum. The female vocalist, Hillary Scott, doesn't seem to know the song as well as the guys, but she wings it and finds her harmony lines.

Finally, a couple of non-professional acts. The first is an earnest attempt, but the recording makes clear the problem of pushing the bass part too hard. Let it resonate, but don't sing it out, man. (Also, something's a little off with the guitar. That's the time to just pause out of this one...)

The second, by the Hartley Brothers sounds great (and has a terrific toy poodle pontificating).
-

A great song by Young, terrific arrangement by Matthews and Nesmith, and kudos to the Eagles for bringing it to the attention of a whole lot of people.

Another joke from Mari

2011-03-11T07:40:00.001-05:00

What did one ocean say to the other?

Nothing, they just waved.

Kid poetry

2011-03-07T15:24:00.000-05:00

By Mari:

There's a bug in your nose
and it bited your toes.

By Austin:

I Am a Leprechaun

I am a Leprechaun
all happy and Healthy
I am a Leprechaun
I love green and I'm wealthy,
I am a Leprechaun
I hate those vampires
When Leprechauns get their powers
I'll set all vampires on bunches of fires.

Tiger Mothering

2011-02-27T22:07:00.001-05:00

I just finished Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother
by Amy Chua and now I feel like I can actually comment on it legitimately.

So: it's funny (humorous, not strange. well, a little strange). Chua is a funny writer and has a dry, self-deprecating sense of humor. She mocks herself as much as she promotes herself.

The book is told in short, very readable chapters that are occasionally repetitive, but every chapter is provocative and amusing.

That said, I did not come away with a favorable impression of Chua. Not because of her parenting (or rather, not simply because of her parenting) but because she is an insufferable snob. She is status obsessed and presents herself as deriving no pleasure from her life except achieving milestones. When her mother-in-law dies, Chua's daughters eulogize their grandmother as life-affirming and someone who was full of joy. Chua's chapters about the woman, in contrast, present her as having impeccable taste: she wore great clothes, collected great art, ate great food and Chua strives for her compliments.

Another example: she has three sisters and Amy claims to be closest with her sister Katrin. I have no reason to dispute this claim, but her way of explaining how similar they are is to mention that both she and Katrin went to Harvard as undergraduates and also went to Harvard professional schools (Law for Amy, an MD/PhD for Katrin). Sure, except she's a lawyer and another sister went to Yale and then Yale Law School, so superficially, it seems to me that being a lawyer is a lot more similar to another lawyer than to a scientist unless you overhype the Harvard brand.

Similarly, the pushing of her daughters is all toward Juilliard or Carnegie Hall (and then the main hall at Carnegie Hall) -- she admits she doesn't expect or want her children to become professional musicians, she just wants them to have amazing college applications.

She complains about over-the-top bat mitzvahs but the amount she spends to celebrate the Carnegie Hall performance -- they amount she spends just to audition for new teachers -- is insane. I think she recognizes the hypocrisy and means it to contribute to the humor, but it's still crazy and hypocritical.

And don't let the Chinese/Westerner comments fool you: she's a Western snob. She obsesses over European classical music and insults Indonesian gamelan music and discounts Chinese music. She imposes Chinese discipline in order to instill Western culture in her girls. Ironic? She doesn't really do irony.

Ultimately, Chua's value system seems very superficial.

What she does do well, however, is to present ambition with a lack of shame. I think it's good to have high expectations for your kids, and Chua is not lacking in expectations.

Oh, do you want to know how it ends? Her younger daughter Lulu rebels and refuses to continue on the mommy track of violin playing (she continues to play, but for herself -- no more mother hovering marathons of practicing). Instead, Lulu pursues tennis. Not a bad choice, but Chua is only satisfied with this decision when Lulu starts winning competitions. If it's not measurable, Chua has no interest.

So, is it worth reading? Sure, it's a quick read and there's plenty to muse on so it's a high return on your time investment but that's pretty faint praise, I have to admit. Have we already all moved on? Perhaps, but this book will certainly mark a moment in parenting literature.

Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother

Chinese New Year Letter

2011-02-08T09:24:00.000-05:00

Our semi-annual (as in, when we remember to do it) Chinese New Year letter is now online, with news of our activities in 2010. Happy New Year!

Mari's Joke

2011-02-07T09:24:00.000-05:00

The latest in a series of original jokes:

Q. Why DIDN'T the cat cross the road?

A. It was a scaredy cat.

Austin's latest jokes

2011-01-03T21:27:00.000-05:00

So, among his daily misfires, Austin came up with a couple jokes that I thought worth passing along.

Q. What's a Chinese pirate's favorite number?

A. 2 (pronounced "Aarh!")

Q. What happened to the robber who needed a nap?

A. He got ar-rest-ed.

Reading

2010-12-22T12:08:00.000-05:00

The library of New Bedford, MA has set up a program to encourage reading: if you read 50 books in one year, they will give you a prize (and you will be entered in a drawing for more prizes). Pretty cool.

Of course, that leads one to wonder, how many books have I read this year?

Well, since I've been keeping track on Goodreads, I had a place to look. Last week it looked like I had read 37 books in 2010 (9 days to go!). Since then, I've been finishing up the half-read books lying around the house and got two more up there. If I'm lucky, I might hit 41 or 42 by the New Year, but 40 is more likely.

I have to admit, too, that a lot of those books are comic books (some of them are huge though -- the Walking Dead compendium is 48 issues, or over 1000 pages), and some are children's books. But in my defense, I read a lot more comics and kids books that I don't put on Goodreads because I don't feel they are all worth noting.

So 50 books next year? Hard, but doable. Cancel that New Yorker subscription!

My other thought about reading next year was to have a year of presidential biographies. That would cut down on thinking about what to read and there are plenty I have wanted to tackle for a while: Edmund Morris on TR, Grant's autobiography, American Sphinx, John Adams... Of course, those are big books so I might have to aim for 30 or thereabouts (or read a lot of quickie thrillers in between).

(Feel free to "friend" me, or whatever, on Goodreads, btw.)

Just for the record...

2010-12-21T17:11:00.002-05:00

... Mari's stated ambition now, at age 6, is to be president. She thinks it would be extra neat if she were the first "girl" president.

I asked her if I could come visit her in the White House.

She said, "Well, only IF you're still alive."

Fair enough.

Art: updated with pictures

2010-12-08T14:13:00.001-05:00

The kids are becoming artists!

The art teacher at their school chose 3-4 projects from each grade to contribute to the art exhibit at the Dept. of Education building and both Mari and Austin's were chosen! Mari made a flower out of paper and Austin did Chinese brush painting.

Not only that, they each published a photograph in the Working Writer's Daily Planner. Pretty neat!

Austin with his painting of mountains and bamboo. His teacher recognized his minimal use of strokes.

Mari with her flower. Very symmetrical and three dimensional and with a detailed background.

Excuses, excuses

2010-12-04T13:00:00.000-05:00

Just invited someone over to our house and he replied with this e-mail:

Unfortunately I’ll be in Erbil that day. [I added the link.]

Can't really argue with that.

Latest photobooth

2010-11-30T11:37:00.002-05:00

From July 2010

On Wikileaking

2010-11-30T10:22:00.000-05:00

Not that anyone asked me, but here's my thoughts on Wikileaks:

When there is a war that may involve illegal or unethical conduct and you expose that conduct, that can count as a principled stand. Agree or disagree, with the names of individuals redacted to protect their identity, I was generally on Wikileaks side.

However.

When you expose diplomatic communiques just because you can, you are being a douchebag. What is the principle here? Transparency uber alles? Wikileaks has just crossed the line into being one of those assholes who thinks that truth telling is absolute and goes around telling everyone that their kids are ugly, their wife is fat and people are talking smack about them behind their backs. Thanks! Didn't need to know!

If there was a secret plot that would have a 95% chance of capturing or killing Osama bin Laden, would this jerk publish it on the internet for everyone to see? Are there not some secrets worth keeping?

And in the case of the diplomatic cables, aren't there some secrets not worth sharing? I mean, did anyone not think Berlusconi is an aging lothario bully who tries to paper over his failings with flamboyant sex? Is anyone surprised to hear that Medvedyev is Putin's puppet, or that Sarkozy has a real insecurity problem? Is this news? No, this is a late night comedic monologue. Anyone who is surprised was probably surprised when they learned that there are homosexuals in the Roman Catholic priesthood.

That said, is it nice for people to point your failings out to your face? No, it's not.

I guess what I wonder is, what is the point of this latest document dump? How does it help anyone's agenda? Will it end wars? Begin dialogues? Does it do anything positive? Or is it just a net negative?

Post Halloween binge

2010-11-03T17:47:00.002-05:00

Okay,

I'm tired of being constantly pestered "Can I have some candy?"

The kids had a decent dinner tonight so I told them they could eat as much candy as they wanted from 6:30 to 7. Exciting and kind of gross.

Balance

2010-08-02T19:16:00.000-05:00

Two years ago we took Austin's training wheels off his bike and tried to teach him to ride. He tried, we got frustrated, he got frustrated, snow fell.

Last year, we tried again and he tried hard and by the end of the summer, he was getting up and riding in a parking lot.

Earlier this summer, he was scared to try again but now he's doing well and feels like he can ride around the block by himself.

Earlier this summer, we bought Mari a Float, a bike with removable pedals. Last Monday, Julie and I played tennis while the kids had their bikes on the basketball court next door. Austin was soon riding around in circles, stopping and starting at will. Mari shoved off with her feet and glided a few yards at a time.

Yesterday, I put Mari's pedals on her bike and she tried it, went ten feet, then got frustrated. She refused to let us touch her, touch the bike, talk to her about bicycles or even look at her (except when she was mad that we weren't watching her).

This morning Julie and I played tennis again and when we were done, Mari was riding around in circles like a pro! Her second day with pedals!

We're very proud.

Toronto 2010

2010-07-21T09:13:00.001-05:00

We went to Toronto for a week. And I record here our schedule and impressions for sake of memory and so when people ask me what to do in Toronto, I can send them a link.

Keep in mind that we have two kids, currently age 7 and 5.

Our first day, a Saturday, we went to the Skydome / Rogers Centre and saw the Red Sox play the Blue Jays! There were a lot of Red Sox fans in attendance. Mari lasted for about 5 innings, and then we stayed for one more before heading out to walk over to Harbourfront and Queen's Quay. Harbourfront was hopping with an electronic music festival which included lots of hip hop dancing. At Queen's Quay, we looked in on the Museum of Inuit Art. Although I learned something from the museum, I wouldn't put it on a must-see list. That said, Julie was charmed by her first visit to the Harbourfront.

On Sunday, we hung out at the pool with my sister's family. For lunch we went to Asian Legend on Shepherd Ave. The food there is very good but not particularly distinctive.

Come Monday, we let the kids go wild at Ontario Place! Every year we admire Ontario Place and wonder if we need to go again. And every year the kids demand it and we find more for them to do. This time around, they were much braver in the water park and we went down the big slides a number of times. Austin turned out to have outgrown the kiddie rides but is now tall enough for the full sized bumper boats! That was great. As usual, some of the most seemingly prosaic equipment was the most fun, in this case, some trick basketball hoops. Everyone from age 2.5 to 40+ had a lot of fun shooting hoops.

Tuesday was spent in the orbit of the Pacific Mall. Julie ordered some new sunglasses, we had lunch at the Mongolian BBQ and then more shopping! Also, bubble tea. We had dinner at my friend Sheldon's new house and he let us play on his drum set! Loud fun.

Wednesday was a day out for Julie and me. We started out down at the Beaches, walking the boardwalk and then heading up Queen Street East. We stopped in the Purple Thumb which had lots of neat locally made and designed clothes and accessories. For the lack of one size, Julie would have bought a dress. The nice ladies there suggested we try the desserts at Dufflet. We took their advice! In fact, we had a gazpacho and a ham and brie sandwich there before gobbling up two tarts: key lime and apple berry. Yum. Still in the Beaches, we stumbled upon Ends and bought some clothes. Not high fashion, but cheap. Like, 99 cent T-shirts (quality cotton, no obnoxious labels or sayings).

We then ventured west to Leslieville. Julie was struck by how many specialty dog stores we've seen in Toronto and declared her favorite was The Bone House, in part because it's small but every item seems well selected (as much organic and Canadian manufactured as possible). Found a great new collar for Boo! We had a couple of beers at Lil' Baci while waiting for my sister and Stephen to join us downtown. The Denison wheat beer (with a note of banana) was very good and we liked the name and glass of another beer, Flying Monkeys, whose motto is "Normal is Weird."

Once we met up with the rest of our group, we went for another drink (hey, it's our annual bar hopping tradition) at Swirl. Not the easiest place to find, you can see the black and white decorated door on the left of the Bone House in this photo.

I heard about Swirl in this review, and sure enough, the food is cooked off-site, stored in mason jars and is pretty good. We had the duck rilletes and a cheese plate from the Leslieville Cheese Market across the street. And I had a nice pear white sangria. (oops, forgot in the first draft to mention Ed's Real Scoop -- a very good ice cream shop at 920 Queen Street East. Apparently Ed was inspired by Steve Herrell's ice cream in Boston!)

From there we went to the Distillery District and Julie and I saw Jitters at the Soulpepper repertory theater. Great fun, and we enjoyed seeing actors we liked from other productions.

Thursday, the whole family went down to the ROM. We saw an exhibit of the Terracotta Soldiers from Xian and was again amazed at how nice the cafeteria is (not aesthetically, but good, decent food at non-gouging prices). Afterwards, we sent up to see the animal exhibits and there were lots of educators showing off hands on exhibits. That was really neat. Julie was amazed by the spider crab. I popped upstairs to look at the Middle East exhibit and watched Clemens Reichl in a two minute film about a lion from Babylon.

On Friday, we went to Ding Tai Fung. This is Julie's favorite restaurant in the area, serving Shanghai style dim-sum including xiao long bao that are so juicy, they seem like soup dumplings. Plus they make mini-dumplings and there is a big window on the kitchen where the kids can watch the dumplings being made. Yum. The mini-mall nearby had some good bubble tea and then we took the kids to the Kidstown waterpark. No giant slides, but otherwise as good as the Ontario Place water park. And free.

A great trip. What was best: discovering new neighborhoods in Toronto. Live theater. Ontario Place.

Kid update

2010-05-18T12:50:00.000-05:00

So here is where we are these days:

Mari is suddenly very interested in words. Unlike Austin, she has not taken to reading early; instead, she likes writing. So she's learning to spell so she can write little notes, not so she can read a book. Maybe this is in reaction to her brother, but in any case this week she has been spelling out words as we bike to school "S-T-O-P!" "G-O D-A-D-D-Y!"

Two odd quirks from these months. Mari has decided she doesn't want to have babies. Why not? Because she doesn't want to breastfeed. The idea kind of creeps her out and gives her the giggles. I explained to her that she doesn't have to breastfeed, that she can give babies bottles but that hasn't quite sunk in yet.

The second thing is that she has a friend, Clare, at school who is Korean. (Her dad is working here for 3 years and then they are going back to Korea.) Thus, Korea has become a country that Mari is very interested in. Any foreign language: "Is that Korean?" News about Afghanistan on NPR: "Is that near Korea?"

Austin, meanwhile, has been obsessively reading Ryder Wyndham's novelization (for Scholastic) of Raiders of the Lost Ark. He also likes reading children's bibles. And, he's writing jokes. The one that made me laugh the most is this:

Q: What do you call an atom's privates?

A: The pe-nucleus.

Parenting Column

2010-03-28T14:41:00.000-05:00

The Boston Globe published my latest parenting essay today, on identity and food shopping.

Austin's 7th birthday party

2010-02-09T08:55:00.001-05:00

Nurture Shock

2010-01-26T16:13:00.032-05:00

A long review and summary of the book Nurture Shock by Po Bronson and Ashley Merryman because I think it was good and had lots of information that I feel I will need sooner or later. Basically, it's a parenting book that looks at sociological studies to determine if modern parenting styles are truly effective in delivering the results we might want. No surprise, that they heavily market the positions where good intentions have bad results.

So here's the Cliff Notes version, for you and for my memory. (Please note, the book is really good and filled with colorful detail and is worth reading):

Chapter 1: Praise.

This has been going around for a while: if you tell your kid that they are "smart" they get freaked out when challenged because they don't know the answer. Better: remind kids that change is possible and constant, or more specifically: your brain is like a muscle and it gets bigger when it works harder.

Chapter 2: Sleep.

Kids need sleep. They need it more than adults do. They aren't just tired after missing some sleep at night, they are slipping behind in their development. Teenagers need sleep and their sleep times tend to be late shifted, so high schools that start later (like 8:30 or 9) find their average SAT score jumping by dozens of points. For little kids, as little as 15 minutes of sleep lost a night will translate in 3 days to work being a full letter grade lower. i.e. 15 minutes of sleep loss changes an A student to a B student. 30 minutes will make a B student a D student. Much of the lost sleep comes in the "slush" period between the evening routine and actual sleep. Spending extra time chatting with your child might be nice for you, but in the long run is not best for your child.

Chapter 3: Race.

Kids are aware of race. They are not "color blind." Further, they already have stereotypes that they are building to make sense of the world. Parents should be explicit about race, and about the achievements of individuals and groups. It's not enough to say, "we're all equal" because kids don't understand that concept.

Chapter 4: Lying.

Kids lie. A lot. And it's not easy to tell if they are (in tests, random adults score at chance levels when trying to determine if a kid is lying).

Kids learn lying from adults. And little kids define lying as saying something that gets you punished. (So swearing is sometimes considered "a lie.") Kids see adults "lie" all the time. White lies, or just approximations ("Just call him 5 so we get the discount; he just had his birthday last month") that seem harmless but to kids seem like adults lying. Broken promises count as lies, too.

Punishing lies does not help. Praising honesty (Geo. Washington) tends to improve honesty.

Don't force kids to lie. "Did you do this?" when you know they did, will only encourage them to lie to you. Better to just explain what was wrong and explain what would be right.

Chapter 5: Kindergarten testing.

Children's minds are so unformed at age 5 that testing for "gifted" children at this age is ridiculous. There is more correlation with later intelligence when kids are tested in 3rd grade.

Chapter 6: Siblings.

Better to teach them to have fun together and not fight than to try to resolve conflicts. Best predictor of siblings getting along (age difference is not one): how well the older child plays with friends. Kids learn from their friends how to play with their siblings, not the other way around. Shared fantasy play is a huge factor, agreeing to imagine a shared scenario.

BTW: books that try to illustrate and solve sibling conflict, like the Berenstain Bears, or Sesame Street books, just exacerbate them. The conflicts are much more part of the story and better remembered than the resolution.

Chapter 7: Teen Rebellion.

Did I mention that kids lie to their parents? All teens lie to their parents. The best teens lie a little less. Most teens fight with their parents. For many of them the fighting makes them feel bonded and protected by their parents. In fact, some choose to tell the truth just to provoke a fight just so they know their parents are concerned about them. Parents who are lenient because they want their kids to tell them everything are still lied to and the kids turn out worse. Bottom line: stick to a few basic rules and be flexible enough to make exceptions and your kids will lie less to you.

They also have crazy hormones that screw up their pleasure levels, so they need to do extreme things to get a kick out of life. Also, the one thing they hate the most is peer rejection (like asking a girl out or standing out in a crowd).

Chapter 8: Self-Control

Here they discuss Tools of the Mind, a pre-K and K curriculum that emphasizes planned role plays (like firemen or house) where children make a concerted effort to stay "in character" and thus build their imaginative abilities. Bottom line: get your kid into one of these programs, or if not, recognize that playing, especially make believe play, is very important to kids' development.

Being able to pay attention to oneself, to judge one's work (best letter forms, or checking own spelling), and to concentrate on one task are all elements of self-control. Self-control leads to higher order thinking and much better learning in general.

Chapter 9: Agression.

There are 3 main kinds of aggression, including relational aggression (using words to attack a relationship "you're not my friend anymore"); kids who watch PBS shows show more relational aggression than kids who watch violent cartoons (!).

Relational aggression is usually a sign of intelligence, because the kids understand the social effects of what they are doing; some of these kids end up being very good at directing groups and become the popular kids in high school.

"Progressive Dads" tended to have as many aggressive and disruptive kids as "Disengaged Dads" (and presumably more than "Traditional Dads"). The authors' conclusion was that P Dads tend not to have consistent discipline so the kids test boundaries more often.

Chapter 10: Oral Language acquisition.

It's all about listening. While it's important that kids hear lots of language spoken around them, it's more important that parents listen to kids and respond to what they are saying without delay. This encourages the child's speech and improvement. This is especially important with infants, but could have benefits as kids acquire more vocabulary as well.

That's it! Well written book, much recommended.

Birthday comix

2009-11-22T08:27:00.000-05:00

And now, as promised, the "exquisite corpse" comics jam.

Gavin had an odd shaped notebook that was perfect for a comic strip. We passed it around and each person added a panel, having only seen the panel immediately preceding it. It's a bit disjunctive, but there's a surreal flair to it that no one person could have come up with (I hope; if you are that one person, please seek psychiatric attention).

The artist/writers are: Gavin Grant, Chris D'Aveta, Maria Daniels, Ada Vassilovski, Pete Cramer, Julie and me.

Birthday comix

2009-11-21T10:31:00.004-05:00

Peter Cramer and Ada Vassilovski, like Gavin Grant and Kelly Link (see Monday!), used ComicLife on the Mac to produce an adventure serial. Lots of cameos in here, including my dad, some of the contributors to this comix week, and an ass.

Don't forget, click to enlarge!

And tomorrow: the Exquisite Corpse experiment! Stay Tuned! Same Blog Time, Same Blog Channel!

Birthday comix

2009-11-18T09:43:00.000-05:00

Maria Daniels did hers like a daily newspaper strip, albeit one with a "Life in Hell" funny animal vibe.

Mari at school

2009-11-17T20:17:00.001-05:00

We interrupt "Birthday Comix week" to link to Mari's nursery school class blog:

http://wnstk.blogspot.com/2009/11/woodland-videosphotos.html

She's identifiable in a few videos, most notably the swinging vine.

Birthday comix

2009-11-17T09:37:00.001-05:00

This one is from Chris D'Aveta. He went for the classic one panel. There are some existential Donnie Darko elements, too. If it seems like an obscure reference to an unknown narrative, sorry, but that's the way it is. It makes sense to me, and I'm not going to explain it here.

Birthday comix

2009-11-16T08:35:00.007-05:00

I'm 40 today. Over the weekend, we had dinner with some friends and Julie asked them to make comics for/about me. This week: Birthday Comix!

Each of these were made by a friend (or friends) and at the end of the week I'll post the "Exquisite Corpse" Comic made at the dinner party.

Subscribe so you don't miss any exciting issues!

First up, from Gavin Grant and Kelly Link. (I was told Gavin did most of the inside and Kelly punched up the cover). They use the basic superheroic format (and get a lot of mileage out of photos that appeared on this very blog!):

UPDATE: click on the images to enlarge to legible size.

Allegations

2009-11-10T17:15:00.002-05:00

I understand assuming someone is innocent before guilt is proven, and it's a principle I support heartily.

That said, it's weird to hear NPR reporters refer to the "alleged gun man" at Fort Hood. I mean, there were hundreds of witnesses. He was not framed. He conceivably be found not guilty by reason of insanity, but he would still be the gun man at Fort Hood who shot people.

I suppose the reason it seems weird is that in situations like this, the gun man is usually shot dead and they just refer to him as "the gun man" without any qualifications.

Book Review: The Blind Side

2009-11-09T22:43:00.001-05:00

The Blind Side: Evolution of a Game by Michael Lewis

My rating: 5 of 5 stars
Beautiful book about the evolution of the left tackle in football and the biography of a young talent, Michael Oher.

The left tackle is the guy who protects the quarterback on the side that most right handers are not facing, i.e. the blind side. In the early 1980s, this guy was being paid peanuts, the same as the other offensive lineman and maybe half the salary of the guy he lined up against who was determined to knock the quarterback down. Today, he's often the second highest paid player on the team after the quarterback. More than the running backs, more than the receivers (and more than some quarterbacks).

The explanation of how this happened and what skills are necessary to play the position are intermingled with the story of Michael Oher. Oher is a huge black kid from the poor projects of West Memphis who through a combination of charity, fluke, guilt, and greed, ended up at Briarcrest Christian School in white, rich East Memphis. He attracted a lot of attention and especially the attention of Sean and Leigh Anne Tuohy. They Tuohys buy Michael clothes, then let him crash on their couch, and eventually legally adopt the boy. This family story is told with incredible warmth and emotion and not a little humor. There are lines of dialogue in the book that made me laugh out loud. At one point, the NCAA is investigating to make sure the Tuohys didn't simply adopt Michael so that they could send him to their alma mater's football program. The NCAA investigator asks questions about Michael's education and Sean Tuohy tells her he doesn't know (his wife and a tutor they hired were in charge of that stuff). This leads to this exchange:

NCAA: ... you don't know if he's supposed to take English or math or science. That's the part that still baffles me.

Sean: Ma'am, I hate that it baffles you. But all you asked me to be is truthful. You didn't ask me to be smart.

One great thing about the story is that in real life I would never get to know a family like the Tuohys: millionaire, white Country Club Republicans obsessed with sports, but I got a lot of pleasure in getting to know them through the book.

Michael Lewis of Liar's Poker and other books, is a great writer with excellent comic and dramatic timing. You don't need to know football to enjoy this book. To put it one way: if you enjoyed Friday Light Nights (book, movie or tv show), you will love this book. To put it another way: I recommended my wife read this with her all women book group. I couldn't put this book down.

View all my reviews >>

Bad name

2009-11-09T22:12:00.001-05:00

Today Mari said, "You know what would be a really bad name if you were a hamster?"

"T.J."

That was all the explanation I got.

Bad words

2009-11-07T11:19:00.002-05:00

Yesterday Austin told me he knew a bad word.

"Really?" I asked, because just the other week he was giggling in the back seat with a friend about a bad word they had heard: "moron."

"It starts with an F," he said.

Hmmm... "fart" was a possibility. "What's the word?"

He looked over at Mari and decided to spell it out: "F. U. K."

I did not laugh out loud but I told him not to say that word in front of Nana because it's very rude.

Mari's 5th Birthday Party video

2009-11-05T20:46:00.000-05:00

Q

2009-10-29T19:46:00.002-05:00

In my podcast listening, I find myself turning more often to Q, a CBC radio program hosted by Jian Ghomeshi. I was first intrigued about the program because that's where Billy Bob Thornton had an epic meltdown that alienated all of Canada (Jian had the nerve to ask Billy Bob about being an actor while Thornton was promoting an album). And then I was amused to see Jian, who I had known as the drummer of the Canadian band Moxy Fruvous.

But I continued to listen. I'm not sure how long the actual radio shows are (2 hours?) but the pods are about an hour long. It's basically a culture show, like Fresh Air but with a younger, hipper host (sorry Terry, you know I love you, but...).

There's a lot of random Canadian content for better or for worse (did you know Harlequin, the publisher of romance novels is a Canadian company?!), although I do like to sort of keep informed. I also give the Canadian bands a chance before fast forwarding. But that's the lot of podcasts, right?

What really blew me away recently, though, was the quality of guests. There is a certain amount of overlap with NPR's Fresh Air as authors or musicians or actors head to Toronto to promote their latest work, but recently Q featured substantial interviews with three great musicians I've never heard interviewed: Van Morrison, Tom Waits and Bill Withers. All three interviews were very different in tone and purpose: Van wanted to rant and found someone with a microphone, Tom was just joking around and seemed like a lot of fun and Bill was cranky and contentious as might be expected. What was nice was that Bill ended by saying how much he enjoyed the give and take he had with Jian. I certainly enjoyed listening in.

A cousin and I had recently debated the merits of Terry Gross and I have to say, while Terry gets more serious and has great talks with serious journalists about the issues of the day, on the culture front, I'm preferring Jian for many of the reasons the unnamed cousin and I had discussed. The main thing is probably just that it's a more natural conversation.

So, check it out: Q.

Austin

2009-10-02T16:06:00.000-05:00

Not sure what this means but a week or so ago, Austin and I were tossing a baseball back and forth and he said, "I don't think I'll ever play for the Red Sox. But I still want to be an artist."

Kind of sad that he's out of the fantasy world where he was going to be a baseball player/astronaut/doctor/teacher/artist/President. Still, realistic.

Photobooth

2009-09-03T20:27:00.001-05:00

The latest in our series. This one is from August 2009.

Toronto pictures

2009-08-21T16:24:00.005-05:00

These are sort of in reverse order, but that's blogging, right?

At the Marina Grill in Ontario Place.

Atom Blaster!
H2O Generator; aka kiddie Habitrail
Mari was in one of those tubes up top.
Water park at Ontario Place.
Rafts going to the top of the River Raft Ride.
Water parks are everywhere in Ontario -- the zoo, L'Amoreaux park, Ontario Place. This is what they look like.
Little India. Julie in her new shirt.
Ambiance Chocolat.
Pizza Pide dude. He's from Ankara.

Nice slogan. Also like the way the windows cut up our reflections.
The new ROM, looking SW from Bloor and Queen's Park.

Toronto

2009-08-20T21:57:00.002-05:00

We're on our annual trip to Toronto to see my parents.

As part of the annual trip, Julie and I went downtown Tuesday (our anniversary) while my parents took the kids to the Ontario Science Center.

First, we parked down in Leslieville because I had read that there were a lot of furniture stores down there. We found quite a few in some old factory buildings on Carlaw between Gerrard and Queen Street East. In one factory we browsed a studio that imported furniture from Asia, another one that imported furniture and furnishings from Africa, and a lighting design firm that provided the lighting for the Bellagio and MGM Grand in Vegas and was working on a Trump project in Toronto.

We stopped for a delicious snack and Bonjour Brioche on Queen. Julie had what she said was the best croissant ever and I had a brioche with cheese and blueberries baked on it, a bit like a cheese danish. And our car was parked right outside of Ambiance Chocolat so we had to sample a truffle each -- scrumptious and beautiful.

It was around lunch time so we stopped at Pizza-Pide for a pide! Pide is a delicious Turkish food that is a lot like pizza -- a thin crust with toppings baked at a high temperature. It was the best pide I've had outside of Turkey, but it was not quite right. I think there was too much meat on the pide. The cook said that he felt like the meat was better quality in Turkey but more expensive; in Canada, he put on extra toppings. The end result, however, was a ratio that didn't feel quite right. Sometimes street food should be made like street food and not gussied up too much. As a side note, the place serves Ayran, a salty yogurt drink that I don't particularly like, but I was so happy to see it in North America.

I may have been extra nostalgic about Turkey because the day before the family had gone to the ROM, newly redesigned with a weird crystal growing out of the north side (and a new entrance on Bloor), and I was trying to tell the kids about Cuyler Young, former director of the museum and an archaeologist I had met and worked with in Turkey. The ROM was gorgeous and the natural history displays were really aesthetically appealing and had enough information to stimulate some good conversations with the kids. The hands-on kids area was also fun, and the food in the cafeteria was quite appealing.

Our next stop was Little India. One of the guys sitting next to us at Bonjour Brioche had told us that Little India wasn't true Indian -- instead it was mostly populated by Indians from Uganda who had been kicked out by Idi Amin. Julie got a neat top and skirt from some little shops and we talked to a guy who made Indian style popsicles using disposable chopsticks as his sticks. We stopped at the Udupi Palace for a snack. Julie ordered some samosas and they were yummy but super spicy. Luckily I had ordered the Dhaivada, a lentil donut that was served in a cool, refreshing spiced yogurt that cut through the heat of the samosas.

From there we visited Cream (or find them on Facebook). We had seen the issue of Now touting the best ice cream in the city and had to try their #1. Well worth it. Julie had the banana chocolate and I had an orange blossom cone. Both delicious. They also make ice cream from sheep's milk. Mmm... dondurma.

We popped down to the Distillery to see if we could get tickets to the Soulpepper Theater but no dice. Last year we had lucked into two rush tickets for their night of one acts, Peter Shaffer's Black Comedy and Tom Stoppard's Real Inspector Hound. The shows were well staged, and had great casts and we had hoped to see another show there. Maybe next year.

West Queen West was as hip as usual and Julie found some great bargains at the Blue Shoe Box' renovation sale (693 Queen St. W, just up a bit from BakkaPhoenix). By the time we left the store she was in a completely different outfit from that morning.

The Duke of York up by St. George had seats out on the patio and we enjoyed some Canadian beers and fish and chips. We also watched some of the Red Sox - Blue Jays game on the tube.

Yesterday, we made a family outing to Ontario Place. The kids love it. This year we brought our bathing suits to enjoy the water park. The highlight was the Rush River Raft Ride, a four person raft down a big water slide. The kids did some rides, we played mini-golf, and we saw an IMAX film called Hurricane on the Bayou. Mari was terrific in the H2O Generation Station (the kiddie habitrail, we call it) and Austin loved the Atom Blaster, which reminded me of the basement of a Chinese department store. We had dinner at the Marina Grille, a restaurant I never realized existed in the middle of the park.

My parents took the kids home and Julie and I got some nosebleed seats at the SkyDome where we saw the Red Sox beat the Jays 6-1. Among the highlights were a Jacoby Ellsbury triple and Kevin Youkilis caught in a rundown between 2nd and 3rd and somehow getting back to 2nd without getting tagged. Lots of Sox fans in attendance, based on the cheering. Not surprising since Fenway is always listed as the most expensive park in the Major Leagues and tickets to the Dome were just $14 -- Canadian!

We've had a lot of fun hitting the family attractions here (the kids are 6 and almost 5 this year). Looking forward to taking the kids to Casa Loma in a year or so, or up the CN Tower. Maybe even take Austin to the Sky Dome.

Yay, Toronto!

Austin now

2009-07-12T14:47:00.002-05:00

Came into the kitchen this afternoon to see Austin sitting at the table, eating some cereal and reading a hardcover book with no pictures.

I have a feeling this is a scene that will be repeated for years to come, but today was the first.

Tell don't show

2009-07-01T22:12:00.001-05:00

Writing teachers often tell you to "show, don't tell" but sometimes telling what you're showing can be very entertaining. As in:

The version of Total Eclipse of the Heart is also good.

Palin post-mortem

2009-07-01T13:05:00.001-05:00

I was reading Todd Purdum's story about Sarah Palin in Vanity Fair and this sentence popped out at me:

When I ask Mark Salter, McCain’s longtime speechwriter and co-author, about that comment, he says simply, “McCain always talks unscripted."

Salter has a pretty cushy job then.

Austin self-portrait

2009-06-29T19:51:00.003-05:00

This is a self-portrait Austin made yesterday. (I scanned it with a red background so that the white "frame" is visible.)

He's made self-portraits in school before, but this is the first one I saw where he sat down and examined a mirror and really went for details like his eyes and ears, lips and even filtrum (that dent between lips and nose). I was really impressed.

Great video

2009-06-26T19:28:00.001-05:00

From NewsFromMe.

Up is a Downer

2009-06-25T20:19:00.003-05:00

Took the kids to see Up this afternoon.

It's beautiful,funny, scary but overall, I have to say, it's romantic and melancholy. I don't think I've ever been so sad at an animated film before.

And it's not just me.

Mari was scared of the house falling over a cliff and then she was scared of the pack of dogs that showed up, so we had already taken a little walk outside and she was sitting on my lap when Carl looked through Ellie's book of adventures.

He flipped through the pages and there were photos of his marriage and he sat there next to her empty chair.

Mari's body was wracked with sobs. What's wrong? I asked her. Are you sad?

This is a quiet part of the movie, so everyone in the theater (not that many, but all of them) heard her sob, "I'm thinking about when Mommy dies."

Of course, that broke my heart, too.

So there's Pixar's triumph: conveying in blobs of computer generated color the depth of a romance and the abyss of loss to a four year old.

(PS. Afterward, I asked Mari if she liked the movie and she did, even though it was sad. Something to be said about learning that stories don't have to be completely happy to be "good.")

Still have kids

2009-06-25T08:34:00.002-05:00

Haven't mentioned the kids here in a while.

Funny thing, for the first time in years, Mari has become more annoying than Austin. I mean, Austin has always been great, but he's as temperamental, stubborn and opinionated as his father. Meanwhile, Mari's usually a sweetheart.

Lately, though, Austin has matured to an incredible degree. He's very polite, understands (a little bit) putting stuff away and keeping things neat, and he's helpful and considerate.

Nothing wrong with Mari, but she's still a four year old and has a tendency to whine when she's tired or grumpy.

When they're both in good moods, it's terrific to listen to them play together (I tend to get out of their way when they're getting along so well).

Oh, also Mari decided she didn't like the hair in her eyes so she gave herself a haircut today.

My love affair continues

2009-06-25T08:27:00.002-05:00

I've mentioned before my love of my iPod Touch. Well I just updated to the new operating system and although there's been lots of news about new phone features (Voice Dialing), I am totally enamored by a few simple additions to iPod capability.

The first is better control of podcast listening. I was thinking about cutting down the number of podcasts I subscribe to, but now I can listen to them at twice the speed (or half to understand fast talkers). It's amazing how little it affects the sound a of person's voice -- it's faster but it's not like listening to Alvin and the Chipmunks. Also, the feature I've wanted forever is now included: rewind 30 seconds. Especially for long shows like This American Life, I find myself wanting to go back to listen to something I missed but a 60 minute "slider" is hard to manipulate with accuracy. (Hmm... just realized how obscure this is. Oh well, this is my current pre-occupation.)

A second great update came on the Remote feature. It's a lot easier now to choose speakers and control iTunes with this app.

Okay, enough gushing about my toys. I haven't gushed about my kids in a while.

The Parents We Mean To Be

2009-06-22T16:05:00.001-05:00

The Parents We Mean To Be by Richard Weissbourd

This book focuses on how we teach children to become moral beings, defined by the author as people who ask moral questions, see perspectives that are not their own, feel responsibility for others and maintain good relationships.

Weissbourd's prescription for how we teach children morality is two-fold: teach by example and exercising moderation in all of our parenting behaviors.

The best way to teach is by example, and I'm sure I'm not the only one who has changed his behaviors in some ways upon becoming a parent. Some important points in the book are that we should recognize our children's moral development as fluid and not get fixated on "bad kids" or feel like the teenage years are the end point in that process. Similarly, we should acknowledge that our own moral development is a work in progress and occasionally give voice to that, explaining our choices, right or wrong and showing that we as parents can also experience growth.

As for moderation, I think this is one reason I like this book so much. Instead of veering in one direction or another -- touching is good, therefore never let go of your child! -- Weissbourd points out how various behaviors that seem positive -- praise, an emphasis on children's happiness and self-esteem -- can backfire if they are excessive. Children become egocentric and selfish if they think their own happiness is paramount and they become paralyzed with failure if they never encounter it until their twenties.

The chapter on sports was one of my favorites. On the one hand, there are crazy sports parents who live through their kids. On the other hand are parents who downplay competition and try not to care at all. Weissbourd points out that competition is fun in context and teaches kids that opposition is contextual (if their best friend is on the opposing team, for example). Of course, getting too caught up in the game is unhealthy for lots of reasons, too.

There is plenty of advice for parents, teachers, coaches and just adults in general on what they can do to help children grow up to be better people. (One I liked was to make a pact with other parents to be honest with each other so you have a warning that you're going overboard one way or another.)

The most compelling reading in the book came from the anecdotes that begin each chapter, from parents, coaches, and especially from children themselves (who see through all sorts of hypocrisy and "parenting techniques"). The explanations of academic studies are fine and lend weight to the arguments presented. Although, I have to repeat myself and say that the most compelling part of the argument was that it was not extreme in any way, but rather thoughtful and reflective.

Well worth reading.

Book ethics

2009-06-14T12:56:00.002-05:00

Today's Ethicist column is about a woman who got a library book autographed by "her favorite author" on an airplane and then replaced the library book with a new copy of the title.

Here's my problem with the dilemma: Her favorite author and she got it out of the library? Look, I probably have seven books out from the library right now (for myself, not for the kids). However, if any of the dozen authors I consider a "favorite" publishes a new book, I buy it. Partly because I will want to keep it, but also so the author actually earns some of my money.

There's nothing unethical about using the library, but if you really want to support an artist (of any sort), give them sales figures and, frankly, money.

A little disappointed that Randy Cohen didn't address that.

The Great Brain books

2009-06-09T15:48:00.000-05:00

The Great Brain Is Back by John Dennis Fitzgerald

My review

rating: 2 of 5 stars
This review is for the entire Great Brain series by John D. Fitzgerald. The series is comprised of eight books, the first seven of which were published from 1967 to 1976 and the last one was published posthumously in 1995 from notes left by the author. There is also a great Publisher's Note that I will discuss toward the end of this review.

Overall, I would say that the first two books are the best by far and the first five are worth reading as a set. The last three books are like return visits to a favorite village but are hardly great novels. The first two books, The Great Brain and More Adventures of the Great Brain, read like one high quality novel, telling the story of Tom D. Fitzgerald, aka the Great Brain, from the point of view of John D. Fitzgerald. The stories take place in the town of Adenville, Utah in 1896. The Great Brain is acknowledged as clever by everyone but, as J.D. points out, his money-loving heart directs that brain into developing schemes to bankrupt the other kids and fill Tom's coffers. A lot of the fun of these first two books is the narrative conflict between the hero worshipping John and the tricks his brother plays on him and his friends.

The next three books develop the idea logically. Me and My Little Brain is the story of John trying to be like the Great Brain. Tom has gone away to boarding school and the Fitzgeralds adopt an orphan named Frankie. John doesn't have Tom's talent for scheming and is constantly caught and punished but he does have a good heart, and courage, and manages to save Frankie from an outlaw and earn a reward.

The Great Brain at the Academy tells the story of what Tom was doing at his Catholic boarding school -- tricking other kids there and sneaking around the Monsignors who ran the place.

In The Great Brain Reforms, the series comes to a logical conclusion. Partly because of Frankie's perspective, and in large part because he's just older and wiser, John recognizes that Tom is a bit of a jerk. He's constantly tricking other kids into losing bets to win their baseball gloves or other Christmas gifts when Tom has more than enough money just to buy those items from himself. It's also clear that the Fitzgeralds are more prosperous than many other in Adenville. John finally organizes the kids of the town and they put Tom on trial. His sentence is to be shunned by all the kids but the sentence is suspended if he agrees to reform.

The last three books of the series tell more stories of town, but now that J.D. is no longer naive, the stories just seem like trickster tales without any narrative irony or moral weight.

The last book has a publisher's note that explains some of the observations I've made here. Apparently The Great Brain originated as the second sequel to Papa Married a Mormon, Fitzgerald's best-selling novel for adults. In that book, he explains why John D's father came to Utah -- to fulfill his mother's dying wish that he keep an eye on a wayward brother who was a brawling saloon keeper. That book explains the presence of Aunt Bertha, tells stories of Brownie the dog, and tells of the adoption of an orphan boy, but unlike Frankie, this boy is orphaned when his father drinks himself to death. John's brother Tom refers to himself as The Great Brain but all of his schemes go awry. All is set in the familiar Adenville, as well as Silverlode, the mining camp that is described as a ghost town in the Great Brain books.

By the time Fitzgerald finished writing the third book in his series for adults, two things had changed. The adult market no longer found a place for family stories and his editor had moved to a different publishing house. Fitzgerald's agent sent the book to the editor, E.L. Doctorow, at the new publishing house where the manuscript was read by the editor of children's books. She loved the book, asked that it be cut in half and the adult themes be excised and The Great Brain was born.

This may explain why the first two books of the series seem of the same high quality and almost to be the same novel. (Papa runs to almost 300 pages whereas the Great Brain books are usually just over 100.) The publisher's note also mentions that "I had a constant struggle with him not to let Tom reform." It seems clear to me that Fitzgerald would have been happy with the morally and narratively satisfying conclusion of book 5's trial.

All in all, I've enjoyed re-reading these books (and reading Papa and TGB is Back for the first time). I've also looked over Fitzgerald's co-written Structuring Your Novel. He had some pretty solid rules there. The Great Brain books, 1-5 constitute a great epic story for children or adults. And for those who can't get enough (like me), there's three more helpings of Adenville lore.

View all my reviews.

Chitty Chitty Bang Bang

2009-05-31T21:25:00.002-05:00

We just watched Chitty Chitty Bang Bang tonight. It was a lot of fun and the kids enjoyed it. We've been kind of obsessed with it in our house for a while because it was one of the free offered DVDs from Kellogg's cereal. We had to collect five proofs of purchase and every time we finished a box, we would talk about getting Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

In the midst of this cereal box collecting, I got the original book from the libary. The book is by Ian Fleming, of James Bond fame, and like the Bond books, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang is filled with marvelous inventions, groan inducing punning names and, well, not so hot writing. It's fine, but it's kind of dry and not really very compelling except for exciting plot points (a car that flies! a cave that opens up into a hideout!).

The book was a bit of a shock to me, because I remember the movie as being full of weird castles and scary child-catchers, geek dads and missing mothers-- in short, being more like a Roald Dahl book than an Ian Fleming book. Well, as it turns out, the movie's screenplay was written by Dahl (and the director, Ken Hughes).

What was also suprising is that most of what I remember of the movie is just the last 40 minutes -- the car becomes a boat, flies, they go to a weird country where children are outlawed and the adults have to pretend to be toys to be let into the castle.

The first hour and a half of the movie concerns the whistling candies, a failed contraption at a fair, meeting the love interest, Truly Scrumptious, and "grandpa" making his daily trip to the outhouse ("I'm off to India!"). There are also lots and lots of songs. I remembered title song and "You are my oochy coochy little teddy bear" but not much else.

A note on Truly Scrumptious: the actress was Sally Ann Howes. According to the IMDB, she replaced Julie Andrews in "My Fair Lady" on Broadway and even earned a higher salary than Andrews!

The songs in the movie were written by the Sherman Brothers, Richard and Robert. They wrote lots of songs for Disney, including the songs from The Jungle Book, Mary Poppins and "It's a Small World." Apparently there is a documentary out now about the Sherman Brothers, called "The Boys."

Well, the kids liked the movie (they've yet to dislike a movie) although Mari closed her eyes when Dick van Dyke and Sally Howes kissed and Austin thought it was boring when she was singing about love. We strongly reminded them that this was all made up and that there is no country where children are outlawed. Hopefully, they won't be scarred the way we were (Julie mentioned afterwards that she remembered the child-catcher scene lasting forever and being much scarier than it did tonight. I remembered it the same way she did).

Chitty Chitty Bang Bang came out in 1968 and watching it, I felt like I was watching a pre-cursor to Wallace and Gromit (similar breakfast making machine) as well as a proto-version of the robot when Truly Scrumptious pretends to be a doll.

Here's Richard Sherman playing his title song from the movie for an audience of toddlers:

And, just because Mark Evanier posted it recently on his awesome website, here's some random Japanese celebrities singing the song (the Sherman link was from Evanier, too) [just the latest in my constant reminders that I will never understand Japanese culture]:

Form letter post-mortem

2009-05-14T14:40:00.002-05:00

After sending out a form letter about our move and our past year, I noticed a few things.

One is, a bunch of people looked up our address on Google Maps and commented on the neighborhood and the lot. Also, all the people who did this live in the SF Bay Area.

Second, even though I don't feel that old, in going through my address book, I saw quite a few names of friends who are deceased. This is not counting people who were in their 60s or 70s when I met them. At least three or four people died at my current age or younger.

Third, quite a few people asked about pictures of the new place. I didn't want to include attachments to the form letter, so I'll post some here. I just took these this week of the backyard. Give us some time to fix up the house and paint and we'll post pictures of the house then. But meanwhile, some pictures of the yard (we added no plantings; these are all perennials):

The raspberry patch with the neighbor's cherry tree petals all over it.

Luscious ferns along the path.

Our roomy lawn. Kids are by a little water feature and fountain in the middle there.

Personal vs. Political

2009-05-13T08:45:00.002-05:00

Yesterday, Ross Douthat, the new conservative voice on the Times Op-ed page wrote an article about Obama's positions on gay marriage and abortion. Part of his thesis is that demographic trends favor gay marriage so if Obama waits long enough, it won't be hard to legalize gay marriage and he contrasts this with polling trends that suggest that more young Americans (under 35) call themselves pro-life rather than pro-choice.

The trouble, I think, is that young Americans (under 35) are dumb. Or rather, they don't seem to know the difference between policy and personal choice. Case in point: Meghan McCain. Here's a recent article she wrote about GOP platforms. In it, she claims to be pro-life (presumably because she would never choose to have an abortion) but insistst that if she became pregnant she and her family should be allowed to make that choice. I have a feeling that many people feel the same way: I should have the choice to be "pro-life;" this is a pro-choice position.

(And ultimately what they mean is, "I can't imagine, right now, a situation in which I would have an abortion." However, imaginations are limited.)

If polling matters (and it does for politicians), the pro-choice groups should create advertising that clarifies this position.

Chile photos

2009-05-11T08:24:00.003-05:00

I'm finally posting some photos from Chile. They are more or less randomly selected.

Amy and Julie at a cafe in Vina del Mar. Turns out the chef worked on Martha's Vineyard for years.

John and I got Chilean hats.

The cousins. This is at a little fishing village on Chiloe Island.

Mari flying. There was a trampoline at the cabanas where we spent Christmas.

Penguin!

Christmas day with a volcano in the background. We were on our way to go swimming.

Austin in front of the world's largest pool.

View from the volcano.

What Julie Always Says

2009-05-07T11:48:00.003-05:00

She says that the most realistic medical show on television is Scrubs. A Slate piece explains.

(If I had known this was of interest to the world, I would have pitched the idea to Slate long ago!)

Guitar humor

2009-05-06T09:30:00.002-05:00

As I bludgeon my way through guitar books, I find the dots very helpful. Therefore, I find this video very funny:

If you're not amused after the first surprise guest (2:35 or so) don't bother with the rest.

Papa Married a Mormon

2009-05-04T13:57:00.001-05:00

Papa Married a Mormon by John Dennis Fitzgerald

My review

rating: 3 of 5 stars
I have been obsessed with John D. Fitzgerald lately, but I think I may have found some closure after reading Papa Married a Mormon, his book about life in the Utah territories before and after statehood. It’s both the adult version and an antidote to the Great Brain books.

Fitzgerald was, of course, the author of several Great Brain books for children and the eponymous narrator of the books, J.D. Papa Married a Mormon is presented as fiction, but based on life. The Foreward describes the author’s promise to his mother that he will write the true story of the west, through tales of his family. There are even photographs of the family in the book.

A book like this published today could be a post-modern pastiche, like Kinky Friedman’s detective novels or J.G. Ballard’s Crash, both of which use the author’s name for the protagonist. This would be pretty unlikely in 1955 when the book was published, however. The novel is romantic and sentimental, seeing the goodness is nearly every character, but it is never boring. It also serves as the template for the Great Brain books that would come a decade later.

The same characters are there. Mama and Papa, of course, and older brothers Sweyn and Tom. Aunt Bertha, who wasn’t really their aunt, and Uncle Mark and Aunt Cathie also figure prominently. Even J.D.’s dog Brownie has a chapter devoted to him, although in this book he’s involved in a vicious dogfight. Older sister Katie is never mentioned in the Great Brain books, however.

Also missing in the Great Brain books is the looming presence of Will D. Fitzgerald. It’s clear why he isn’t in a children’s book. He’s Al Swearengen as embodied by Ian McShane on Deadwood – a nasty man who wins a saloon on a poker hand well aware that to make the deal conclusive, he’ll have to kill the previous owner. He takes a dancing girl named Queenie for a mistress and his personality has such gravity that the mining town of Silverlode seems to revolve around his Whitehorse Saloon.

Will also happens to be the explanation to a question I’ve had with every Great Brain book? Why did Tom Fitzgerald, patriarch of the family, come west? According to Papa, he came to fulfill a deathbed promise to his mother to watch over Will, the black sheep of the family.

The Great Brain books always include a paragraph within the first chapter that breaks down the religious demographics of the town of Adenville. Papa goes further and describes all the conflicts and intolerance that goes with religion, although, true to form, everyone learns that God is love and why would He be opposed to interfaith marriage or learning from one another?

Another question I have about the Great Brain is, who is Mark Trainor? J.D. calls him Uncle, but how were they related? In Papa, Trainor is the son of a Mormon bishop who loves his childhood friend, Tena Neilsen. When he realizes that she loves a Catholic, Tom Fitzgerald, Trainor is honorable enough to help them elope. His only admonition to Fitzgerald: “I’ll kill you if you ever hurt Tena or bring her any unhappiness.” The response: “I’d want it that way, Mark.” Later in the book, Mark marries Tom’s sister Cathie, another interfaith marriage.

The kids don’t really come into the story until more than half way, but then we find characters like “Dirty” Dawson. He seems to be the basis for “Britches” Dottie, the girl the Great Brain encourages to go to school, as well as Frankie Pennyworth, the orphaned boy the Fitzgeralds take in. In Papa, Dawson is being raised by his father, who drinks himself to death to forget the death of his wife.

And of course, there’s Tom. Even in this first novel, he refers to his Great Brain, although the schemes described tend to end with Tom’s punishment (although his father, Uncle Will and Mark often get a good laugh out of the mischief). I was surprised that Tom decides to reject Catholicism and become a Mormon. He goes on a mission to China and eventually marries Bishop Aden’s daughter. Not the ending I had imagined for the Great Brain!

Papa Married a Mormon is not a novel of ideas, but it is an entertaining yarn. And as an adjunct to the Great Brain books, it serves to fill out a picture of life in the old West.

View all my reviews.

Big Numbers

2009-03-29T11:28:00.003-05:00

In the late 1980s or so, Alan Moore started a new publishing company and began writing an epic comic book story about and American mall developer building a shopping plaza in England. Oh also, the Mandelbrot set was involved (fractals and all that). I was psyched! Even better, the art was by Bill Sienkiewicz! Amazing! Their previous collaboration was a short parable about American imperialism that involved a bald eagle drinking in a bar.

Anyway, only two issues of "Big Numbers" (the mall story) were published although stories always mention that Sienkiewicz quit the project (schedule problems) and his assistant at the time, Al Columbia took over.

Well, turns out pages for issue 3 were completed and never saw the light of day. Until now. And on the internet. They're here.

Nicholas Brothers

2009-03-25T18:12:00.002-05:00

I'm just posting this link to a YouTube clip to remind myself to show the kids the most amazing tap dancing ever. The first half is good. The second half is better.

Traveling with an iPod Touch instead of a laptop

2009-03-02T16:59:00.000-05:00

I had this great excuse to buy an iPod Touch: I told Julie that I would bring it on our trip to Chile. (I got the Apple iPod touch 32 GB (2nd Generation); my brother-in-law helped justify the purchase and I loaded it up so it was definitely the right model to get.)

Well, it turned out great.

This is what it replaced:
portable DVD player
laptop
Spanish phrase book
calculator
address book
music cds
photo album (we were visiting family)

This is what it let me do:
play videos on the iPod for the kids on airplanes, or in restaurants when they were restless
play videos on hotel televisions as an alternative to Spanish tv
play music on hotel televisions (in some cases I found I had to stimulate the video to activate the audio, so I would put on a photo album slide show); this was nice at Christmas because I could play Christmas music and it was actually quite reflective to see photos from the last 12 months
check e-mail (most hotels and many stores, restaurants and cafes had wifi)
keep up with the news

Now, if you've got one of these, you know that it's not super convenient for surfing the 'net--not as fast as running a browser on a laptop and tabbing through your favorite sites--but it's fine. When we really had to type something out or read something, it wasn't hard to find an Internet cafe or hotel computer to use.

Important information! If you load up videos on the iPod using iTunes, they take up a LOT of space. However, if you download the free software Handbrake, you can convert DVDs to MP4 files for iPods which creates a much smaller file. For comparison, Handbrake converted MP4s run less than 500 Mb per hour. The Apple specs 10 hours for the 8 Gb Touch, so that puts it at about 800 Mb per hour. Makes a difference.

I should note, too, that along with the iPod itself, I had (bought in Chile! Authorized resellers in Santiago and Vina del Mar) the composite AV cable that provides a power cord for recharging and has the cables that lets the iPod play on televisions. Looks like there are cheaper, non-Apple manufactured cables available on Amazon.

The one thing I might have liked was a microphone attachment to make Skype calls back to the States.

So: recommended! Happy Travels

Penguins

2009-03-01T18:27:00.000-05:00

While in Chile, on the island of Chiloe, we managed to get on the last tour boat of the day to see some penguins in their natural habitat.

Austin's 6th Birthday Party

2009-02-14T15:50:00.001-05:00

It's incredible that he's six. I'm not sure if I'm more amazed that time has gone by so quickly or that he's survived all of his hijinks, but here we are. And here's a video of his party:

The Secret Origin of... the Muppets

2009-02-10T13:46:00.000-05:00

Great Muppet trivia from CNN!

Dream

2009-02-09T14:47:00.002-05:00

Sorry to be lame and post about a dream, but this was very spooky and was the first time I ever had... an archaeology nightmare!

(To be clear, I've had lots of nightmares where I was supposed to be someplace on a dig and wasn't ready, and I've also had plenty of experiences on digs I might describe as nightmares, but check this out:)

I dreamt I was digging in a trench and I came upon a bone. As I cleared more area, it became clear it was a tiger skeleton. That was weird. Then another bone, and another tiger. The next bone we cleaned off turned out to be part of a human skeleton. And then another. Lots of human skeletons! It was some sort of massacre that seemed to have involved a huge human and tiger conflict.

Then my dream cut back and flashed forward and from an aerial view I saw lots and lots of trenches, scattered across the landscape and from the bits and pieces I could see that this was a huge trench of tiger and human skeletons in the form of an ever increasing spiral.

Elvis Costello fans take note!

2009-02-03T22:08:00.004-05:00

So, we don't have cable television, but I'm looking forward to the eventual DVD (Hulu?) release of Elvis Costello's talk show "Spectacle."

Meanwhile, an enterprising gentleman has downloaded audio tracks from the show performances and posted the zipfile on his blog. Check it out: collaborations with the Police (Watching the Moon); Elvis sings only the harmony to Alison; with Lou Reed on Perfect Day and more. Special Columbia alumni note: Laura Cantrell sings with Elvis! She graduated a year or two before I did.

(Also: this blogger, Sal?, isn't just some schmo. He used to run NYCD on the Upper West Side. I think it was through his store that I heard about, and bought, the XTC psychedelic side project Dukes of the Stratosphear. Easy to find this kind of thing on the internet now, which explains why Sal is blogging and not sitting behind the counter of a store.)

UPDATE: more audio from the show, this one featuring Rosanne Cash and Kris Kristofferson.

Happy Groundhog's day!

2009-02-02T11:49:00.002-05:00

So, six more weeks of winter.

My question, has the groundhog ever MISSED seeing his shadow? Doesn't Spring usually come in mid-March?

UPDATE: Slate published an article about seeing shadows, etc. And it turns out the rodent sees his shadow 90% of the time.

UPDATE 2: Boston Globe on the usefulness of the rodent in New England.

Clinton

2009-01-20T07:21:00.002-05:00

Just happened to Google "Clinton" and noticed that Hillary comes up before Bill now.

Hallowe'en

2008-12-08T14:56:00.000-05:00

Okay, I realize these are really late, but here are two photos from Hallowe'en. Julie was the makeup artist on Mari (Butterfly Princess) and I did Austin (Vampire). I like how the redeye fits in with the pic.

World History Matters

2008-12-04T20:53:00.002-05:00

I just got a copy of World History Matters: A Student Guide to World History Online, a nicely illustrated and well organized guide to scholarly internet sites. Yes, you can cite these in your papers!

Why did the editors send me a copy? Because I contributed a couple of the reviews that are in the book. Yay.

Public Humanist

2008-12-01T15:12:00.002-05:00

I've got a new post up at The Public Humanist. It's about Tara Donovan, and that all too common reaction to contemporary art: "I could do that."

Please check it out if you get a chance, and leave a comment if you're so moved.

Photo booth

2008-11-12T10:36:00.002-05:00

The latest in our series of photobooth photos. This one is from August, with our niece Neve.

S-P-E-L-L-I-N-G

2008-11-11T21:03:00.002-05:00

Austin is a crazy speller. He spells everything now. What do you want to drink? "W-A-T-E-R."

"I just saw a T-R-U-C-K."

I don't have anything to say about this except that it's happening and I'm impressed. Unfortunately, he's a bit of a stickler about getting things right, so he's reluctant to write anything down without checking the spelling with us first. We just ask him how he thinks something is spelled and he's usually correct.

He did ask me today what an "izland" is.

On a totally unrelated note, for some reason Google thinks I'm in Japan. Thank goodness I use it enough that I don't have to read Kanji.

WEntourage

2008-11-06T09:38:00.002-05:00

So Rahm Emanuel has been offered the job of Chief of Staff. I don't know much about him except that he kept sending me e-mails asking for money a few years ago when he ran the Democratic House campaigns. But here's a summary from the NY Times.

What stood out for me was that his brother is Ari Emanuel, the real-life inspiration for Ari Gold, the Hollywood agent played by Jeremy Piven on HBO's Entourage.

I'm waiting eagerly for Funny or Die or some other enterprising website to put together the West Wing / Entourage mash up with Ari Gold as Chief of Staff. You know, walking and talking (on cell phones) and swearing at aides, telling Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi to "Hug it out, bitches" and making homophobic comments to Barney Frank.

Yes they can

2008-11-05T11:16:00.001-05:00

Election thoughts

2008-11-05T09:34:00.002-05:00

Some thoughts about the 2008 election and campaign:

Since being naturalized in 2002, this may have been the first election that I voted for someone, and not just against someone else.

I voted for Obama because he is someone who seeks the truth, believes in the power of education (formal or not) and chooses to see the best in people.

The fact that he's black is historic and exciting.

I think race was acknowledged but not the most important factor in this election; that is how I want this country to be, and that is the world I want my children to grow up in.

I'm looking forward to having parents of young children in the White House. I wonder what sorts of choices the Obamas will make about schools, for example. This helps reinforce my solipsistic bubble of parental anxiety.

Joe Biden will not run for president anymore. Looking to the future, I wonder if he would take a cabinet post in a second Obama administration and cede the Vice Presidency to a younger politician. Hillary Clinton is also probably too old to run for president again. This year is a generational shift away from the Baby Boom. The Clintons, Robert Rubin, Robert Reich, Madeleine Albright--they've all become "party elders."

(Speaking of Biden, when he said that there was a three letter word that needed attention in this economy, "JOBS, J-O-B-S," I'm disappointed not to have heard any commentators say, "Without Joe, it would just be B.S." I'm not sure what that means, but I think it's funny. Where's my spot on Wait, Wait... Don't Tell Me!?)

Although I'm disappointed that various discriminatory propositions were passed in various states (with California pending as of this writing), it's clear from the demographics of the vote that this is just temporary. Gay marriage will be legal in twenty years.

I hope that this election was empowering enough for young people and other new or lapsed voters that turnout continues to be high in the future.

It's sad that polling places were swamped because of a 65% turnout rate. What would have happened if 90% showed up?

I'm a little amazed that 55 million people voted for McCain. The Electoral Map looks blue, but there are still a lot of people to win over.

Obama's speech last night was perfect. He struck a great tone for the country, telling his supporters that this was just the beginning and a lot of hard work will follow, and telling McCain's supporters that he would continue to try to win them over. The sight of Jesse Jackson's tears really broke me up. The encapsulation of the last century through the story of one voter's life was terrific. Obama's face was so serious, but I got the sense that he was trying not to well up with tears at points (or crack up when he mentioned his daughters' new puppy).

I was interviewed by a Boston Globe reporter and gave a bland quote that the reporter reworked with judicious use of selective quotation.

McCain's speech last night was also excellent. If that had been the tone of his campaign, I think Obama would have still won, but McCain would have gotten a lot more votes.

At my polling place there were people with signs trying to make last minute pitches about candidates or ballot questions. "Dog lovers or pot smokers?" I asked them. Turns out they were taxpayers. The three questions here were all lopsided, 2:1 affairs: No on eliminating the state income tax ($70 million of advertising spent on opposing this), Yes on decriminalizing possession of less than an ounce of marijuana, and Yes on ending dog racing.

Obama won three states where I feel some pride: Massachusetts where I voted, New Hampshire where the family spent a couple of afternoons canvasssing for Obama and Shaheen (who won the Senate seat), and Pennsylvania where I encouraged my sister- and brother-in-law to write letters to their local newspapers.

Last year Austin said he wanted to be president when he grew up. I hugged him and told him he could. If he had said it two or three years ago, I still would have hugged him but I probably wouldn't have said anything.

This will be the first presidential election that my children will remember. I hope they remember that we paid attention to the news, that we were proud to say who we supported, that we volunteered our time and energy (and money) to help who we supported, that we didn't "hate" or disparage opposing candidates just because they were not our choice, and that voting is a civic duty and an act to be proud of.

I think Mari will remember that we hit the Obama office in Salem, NH two days after Halloween and there was a lot of candy on the food table.

Okay, President-elect Obama, you've got an electoral vote mandate. Yes we can feel the fierce urgency of now. I have two words for you: metric system.

Non-election post; poetry

2008-11-04T22:23:00.003-05:00

Austin wrote a poem today. I'll try to replicate his line spacing and capitalization:

IN The mIddle Of
THe nIGHT
THe moon SHINes
BRIGHT

WITH
STARS SHINING
TO AND IF YOU'R
e A WAKE YOU
CAn See THIS
BeauTiFUL
SIGHT.

The Choice

2008-10-23T14:03:00.002-05:00

I'm a news junky and have been following this election very closely. I also just watched Frontline's The Choice and learned a lot. There's something so sober and thoughtful about the show that puts everything into context and takes away a lot of the vitriol. In other words, it's worth seeing even if you've made up your mind.

Public Humanist

2008-10-22T14:36:00.003-05:00

I have two new posts up at The Public Humanist this week. Here and here.

Comments welcome and encouraged!

Notes to parents

2008-10-18T13:29:00.002-05:00

Austin gave me a nice note a few weeks ago.

It said:

I LOVE
YOU
DADDY

When Julie got home, I showed it to her. Isn't he sweet? And then Julie said, he gave me a note, too. She showed me hers:

I HAIT LOVE
YOU
MOMMY

Believe me, it's usually the other way around, but still, I laughed.

Palin as President

2008-10-15T16:31:00.001-05:00

Says it all. The voice isn't great, but some fun flash to explore in the Oval Office.

Walking on eggshells

2008-10-11T04:59:00.001-05:00

Literally. I see them everywhere around West Roxbury, especially around Billings Field.

Good to know the police are on the job!

Sheldon

2008-10-05T18:27:00.001-05:00

My friend Sheldon made a video that's up on the Canadian Discovery Channel website.

Beginning readers' books and series

2008-09-30T13:21:00.004-05:00

We've been very happy with Austin's kindergarten experience so far. His teacher is very nice and seems to have a good sense of his abilities.

Since he's starting to read, she gave us a list of chapter book series with pictures that he might like. I thought I'd share it here, in part because we are bound to lose the piece of paper she gave us. So, the list, with some comments:

Captain Underpants by Dav Pilkey. We have some of these already. A friend of mine called them masterpieces of potty-humor. Follows two rambunctious boys through space-time and superheroics.

Something Queer... by Elizabeth Levy. Less than 50 pages each. Mystery series with lots of pictures. These look to be out of print but available used from Amazon.

Pinky and Rex by James Howe. Adventures of two good friends, a boy who loves the color pink and a girl named Rex.

Cobble Street Cousins by Cynthia Rylant. We love Rylant's Poppleton series (illustrated by family favorite Mark Teague), and also like Henry and Mudge. This is a series about 3 nine year old cousins who live together with an aunt and have various projects.

Meg Mackintosh by Lucinda Landon. Meg writes down clues in her notebook and readers follow along to solve the mystery. B/W drawings of Meg's notebook.

Dorrie by Patricia Coombs. A young witch may not do things right, but can still manage to help adult witches solve their problems. This one you probably want to go to the library for; Amazon's got some used copies but they look to be priced as collector's items.

As we read these books, I'll write up reviews.

Sweet Chile o' Mine

2008-09-29T20:32:00.002-05:00

We're going to Chile!

Yes, we bought tickets to visit Amy and John and Lucia in Santiago in December. It'll be our first Christmas in the Southern Hemisphere. I look forward to flushing the toilet and watching it spin down counterclockwise.

If anyone has any suggestions of places we should see, books we should read, food we should eat, etc. while or before we're there, please let me know.

Missed opportunity

2008-09-27T07:13:00.002-05:00

The thing I wanted Obama to say in last night's debate was this:

"I said that if Osama bin Laden was located in Pakistan, I would send troops in to kill him whether or not we had permission from the Pakistani leaders. Anyone who stops to ask permission before trying to kill or capture bin Laden is not suited to be president."

Bam! Take the high ground! Refocus the war on terror! Make McCain look like a wuss and goad him into saying something outrageous!

Oh well, next time.

Ricky Jay

2008-09-25T09:50:00.002-05:00

Here's a link to a video of Ricky Jay doing... uh... to call this a "card trick" is like calling the Last Supper a "water color."

I'm posting it because I'm going to need to watch it a few more times.

McCain suspending campaign

2008-09-24T18:02:00.002-05:00

If McCain can't campaign and fix the economy, how will he fix the economy, oversee two foreign wars, upgrade American infrastructure and protect our borders as president?

Hey, here's an idea, how about suspend the war in Iraq? Oooh, pwned.

Morning Edition

2008-09-24T16:41:00.002-05:00

So this was on NPR's Morning Edition:

James Coobler, a retiree living in central Florida, says he's undecided.

"Obama, I can't read. I think he tells you what you want to hear," Coobler said. "John McCain seems to be much more of a quiet person but is straightforward as far as what he says."

So, let's break this down, Mr Coobler. Obama "tells you what you want to hear," in other words, Obama is saying things you agree with. Whereas "McCain... is straightforward," presumably because he is so blunt about saying how we need to hunker down and win in Iraq; in other words, McCain is telling things you don't agree with.

Here's a hint: vote for the guy who says things you agree with.

More pigs fly

2008-09-23T14:18:00.001-05:00

Hey,

This George Will guy can be pretty smart.

Candidate tax plans

2008-09-23T14:04:00.001-05:00

The Washington Post made a very clear presentation of each presidential candidate's tax plans.

Mari's birthday party

2008-09-22T06:43:00.000-05:00

Today's pictures

2008-09-21T19:32:00.004-05:00

We had a party for Mari's 4th birthday.

It was at a gym (the Little Gym in West Roxbury).

The kids had pizza, lemonade...

...and cake.

Afterward, we took a walk around Jamaica Pond with Alex, Tom, Amelia and Lydia.

Then we came home and Julie found a beautiful tomato in our garden. She insisted I photograph it...

...as she threw it...

...again and again...

..until I got a shot of just tomato and sky.

It was a nice day.

This one's for dorks!

2008-09-18T17:10:00.002-05:00

In case the introduction doesn't make clear, this is a mash-up of John McCain and Frank Miller's 1980s comicbook The Dark Knight Returns.

If you're dorky enough to care about both subjects, it's amusing.

Our House

2008-09-17T08:25:00.001-05:00

We're on Google Streetview now.

When I checked a few months ago, there was only a shot from the traffic light down the hill, but now there's a picture of our house. Looks like it was taken on a Tuesday evening this summer (some people had not come back from work to pick up their trash cans on our street).